


Pathetic

by Just_All_Random



Category: ONEUS (Band)
Genre: Blood, I'm Sorry, M/M, Suicide Attempt, word vomit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-14
Updated: 2020-07-14
Packaged: 2021-03-05 02:54:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 795
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25257271
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Just_All_Random/pseuds/Just_All_Random
Summary: He was desperate to keep his eyes open, to stay alive, to cling onto the warmth Youngjo never stopped giving him because he was the only person in the world who never stopped caring about him.
Relationships: Kim Youngjo | Ravn/Yeo Hwanwoong
Kudos: 54





	Pathetic

**Author's Note:**

> ‘The End of All Things’ by P!atD

Rain. More rain, as per usual. Pouring, icy pellets of water hitting the lost, cold boy wandering his own neighborhood.

It was pleasant, honestly—lost, mind in total collapse but body still trudging on. It was like a dream almost, sitting at the backseat of a vehicle while some other conscious part of his brain steered him around with not a single clue of where to go but to simply just keep walking in hopes the body knew. 

His vision was blurry— _blurring_. It had been obstructed by the raindrops clinging onto his eyelashes but he could feel his sight growing fuzzy, the last part of his consciousness having difficulty focusing as his body grew weary, heavy with exhaustion and, more likely, the loss of blood.

Darkness was consuming him. Water soaked deep into his skin and trickled over open slashes. Ice chilled his bones, joints losing mobility.

The loud shriek of a name registered in Hwanwoong’s ears as he felt himself shutting down. He was slipping, consciousness drifting away, but he willed his heavy eyelids open because that shriek belonged to the only light that fought off the darkness threatening to take all that was left of him. 

A blurry figure under the street lamps was running toward him. It acutely crossed Hwanwoong’s mind that he was slumped over against a brick wall, his blood mixing with the water pooling at his knees.

Another shriek and a blink later, the figure was in front of him. They were still blurry but Hwanwoong knew who he was. And when every inch of his skin felt numb and cold, warm arms had wrapped around him, pulled him into a heaving chest. 

Rushed murmurs filled Hwanwoong’s ears, doing his best to stay awake like Youngjo was desperately begging him to.

A feeble whimper left his lips in an attempt to speak, in an instinct to reassure. But it was pathetic. It was useless.

As the darkness blinded him, deafened him, silenced him, Hwanwoong felt pathetic. He felt regretful, desperate, pathetic. Because in those few seconds before his body would inevitably shut down, in those few seconds being held close by maybe the only person in the world who cared about him, he regretted. He regretted giving up his life, giving up the only life he had where he could be friends with Youngjo, where he could be given the warmth he lacked by Youngjo, where he could be loved by Youngjo. He was desperate to keep his eyes open, to stay awake, to stay alive, to be held in Youngjo’s arms once more when he wasn’t so pathetic, to cling onto the warmth Youngjo never stopped giving him because he was the only person in the world who never stopped caring about him.

And he was slipping. He was losing. Hwanwoong was weak. He failed, he gave up. He was pathetic.

“Please, hold on, Woongie,” Youngjo sobbed, tightly fastening his jacket around Hwanwoong’s arms and wrists. Sirens rang from afar, blue and red lights flashed, alarming the sleeping neighborhood. Youngjo buried his face into Hwanwoong’s chest, shallowly rising and falling, the faint beat of a trembling heart drowning out the noise of wailing sirens and pounding raindrops and crashing thunder.

“...Jo..” came Hwanwoong’s soft and frail voice, quieter than his beating heart.

Youngjo immediately looked up at the boy, pushing away the mop of soaked locks out of his face. He waited with baited breath, trembling hand cupping Hwanwoong’s cheek. Cold rain was cascading down their faces, but Youngjo could feel the hot tears rolling from Hwanwoong’s eyes.

“I...”

_Love you._

The ambulance arrived, stopping in front of Youngjo and Hwanwoong. People hurried out from the back doors of the truck. They pulled Hwanwoong out of Youngjo’s arms, laying him on a stretcher and loading him into the truck. 

A mask was placed over Hwanwoong’s mouth and air was pushed into his lungs. Shouts of Youngjo insisting to ride with Hwanwoong in the patient compartment began to fade. With the warmth no longer present, the coldness had no problem taking him over.

Hwanwoong forced his eyes open, wishing to see Youngjo’s face one last time.

Their eyes met. Youngjo standing outside in the rain, breathing heavily from yelling, staring inside of the patient compartment at Hwanwoong, who laid limp on the stretcher, grasping desperately at the life he was unwilling to let go of the life he had already given up.

“I’m.....” Hwanwoong hummed dumbly, mind going blank, finally succumbing to the weight of collapsed thoughts. And it was pathetic.

The ambulance doors closed.

_Sorry_.

  
  
  
  


Mechanical beeps and the hum of machinery. Lemon scented cleaning supplies and roses. Large hand and lithe fingers.

Hwanwoong subconsciously curled his fingers around a warm palm before drifting back to sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> I’m so sorry RaWoong
> 
> I didn’t mean for this to be the first fic I post in a while sorry lot’s been going through my mind so :/
> 
> I love blue check out her edit [here](https://twitter.com/dongjusmoon/status/1282683293465546755?s=21)
> 
> (pls work hyperlink)
> 
> K night


End file.
